And Forgive Yourself When It Isn’t Perfect

Somewhere along the line, we filed a map in our brain that said we needed to feel or act a certain way when certain things happened.

Fortunately for us, we own the map…and can make changes when “things go wrong.”

By observing our results and actions, we can more easily recognize when those old, outdated maps need to be updated. And we can update them.

Setting Expectations

For example, I’ve mentioned before that each week I post one update.

Originally, I made the expectation because it was what I did consistently enough that I knew I could do it. (I’m certain now that I also could do more. That’s beside the point.)

In other words, I set an easier expectation for myself.

Unmet Expectations

And then, because it was easier, I relaxed and only met the expectation. Until once, I didn’t.

And, it happened a few times since.

Making Amends

When I allow myself to accept and learn from experiences, the path to future experiences changes.

For example, I can choose to be mad…or I can be happy that I recognize an area to become better.

(I don’t know about you. I’d rather be on the happy path. I imagine my happy path with a cute little fluffy bunny, rainbows and a unicorn. Oh, and trees with birds singing. What’s your happy path look like?)

Changing Perspective

In my example, my map said that I should be upset at myself since I didn’t post my update.

For example, instead of trying to make up for it or being upset about it, I’m choosing to forgive myself and move on.

Please note that I’m also making changes on how I prepare for my weekly updates. But, that’s beside the point… So, anyways… Where was I? Ah, yes…

In Summary

Challenging times shape who we are as we choose how to respond to life’s experiences. Choosing to forgive ourselves and others strengthens us all.

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1 Comment

  • Susan Rivera

    Reply Reply March 26, 2015

    Great article. I agree, it is so important to set realistic expections of ourselves and be forgiving when things don’t go as planned. Sometimes we need to make a little tweak in our navigation.

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